So two weeks ago myself and my mum head off on a wee trip across the Irish sea to visit my sister living in Edinburgh, mum has been over a number of times but I haven’t been since we left her over. Trips like this for me are not and cannot be spur of the moment decisions, they require quite a bit of planning and time management, but anyway we did that, sergeant major Jane made sure every hour of every day was planned out naps included. Unfortunately this trip was booked before my condition deteriorated with the pain, but believe me nothing was going to stop me getting on that plane.

Travelling when in chronic pain isn’t what I’d call fun but I was so excited the adrenaline got me through the relatively quick journey. Before I left home I had a list of things I wanted to get done in Edinburgh and mum had said to me you’re never going to get all that done you have to be realistic but I was determined to get everything done.

I managed to see Edinburgh castle, the Royal mile, the coffee shop where J.K Rowling wrote Harry Potter which is pictured above, a place called camera obscura which is a world of illusions and also has an amazing view of the whole of Edinburgh from the top, it’s well worth a trip. Also I’m super proud that I did it because there is 104 steps to the top and no lift!!!!!!!!! It took me about half an hour to get there with lots of fits and starts but hey who cares I did it!!! Major achievement! 😀 Later that night we went to Shrek the musical ( I swear we’re not kids, although I think we probably enjoyed it more than the kids see pic below and check out our ears)

To say I was exhausted that night is an understatement there isn’t a word strong enough to describe what I was. For our final day we did something that I had been really looking forward to………..The chocolate lounge in Harvey Nichols…..if you’re wondering what that is it is a essentially a restaurant in which the only thing on the menu is chocoalte!!!!! Heaven on earth!!!! After that there was just time for a quick nap before we caught our flight home. It was amazing to see my little sister and spend some time with her in her environment and was great to see her so happy, big shout out to her room mate Emma who kindly dropped us back to the airport making the journey home just a tad smoother for me.

Now comes the not so fun part…. the aftermath!!!! Let me tell you it was not a pretty sight!! Firstly let me just say I don’t care what people think of me, I know I get funny looks for parking in the disabled parking bay and for walking with a stick at my age but I don’t let that bother me, however I have been a bit worried that people on facebook would be looking at my pictures from the trip thinking well she looks fine, what is she on about in her blog she doesn’t look that sick to me!! The saying don’t judge a book  by it’s cover has never been more true. Nearly every time I meet someone out and about they say to me but you look great!! I know they mean it as a compliment but just because you can’t see it doesn’t mean it’s not real. I suppose it’s better to look good than to look terribly sick but it can be frustrating sometimes…anyway I’m ranting a bit now my point was all the pictures I put are posed and with a full face of make up and slapping on a smile ignoring the pain coming from every limb and bone in my body. What you don’t see is the fact that and I’m home from my trip and it took me almost a week to be able to shower (I know my poor parents and brother I’m sure I stank) and then when I mustered up the strength to shower I had to use a shower chair, I didn’t post that picture on facebook. The payback from the trip has been severe but do you know what I wouldn’t change it for the world. I still have to live my life and occasionally push myself past my limitations and do things I didn’t think were physically possible for me and I will never stop striving towards improving my life and making the most out of it, even though some days just getting out of bed will be my goal for the day. We have to take it one day at a time 🙂

On another note a quick medical update, I went to see my new pain specialist the other day and he was great I was so worried he was going to be dismissive and tell me I wasn’t in pain but thank god he wasn’t. So I’ve started on some new patches for pain relief, he also wants to start a muscle relaxer but he’s introducing one thing at a time. I’m going in for a procedure next week on my cervical and thoracic spine (upper and middle) to sever the nerves along all the vertebrae, so we’ll see how that goes. He’s also thinking of recommending me for an inpatient pain management programme in Dublin. So that’s it for now!

Kim xx